cooper-gary-photo-xl-gary-cooper-6231378Are you looking for the perfect vintage-loving partner to spend the holiday season with? Or perhaps your man has been resisting your attempts to ‘vintage’ him so far? Whatever the case, we have asked Trudy Hill, Head of Matchmaking and Coaching at exclusive matchmaking company Seventy Thirty for some expert tips on finding yourself a vintage-loving man, or getting yours to love vintage if he doesn’t already.

Get the attention of that vintage-loving man

Step one: get closer

One of the simplest determinants of attraction is proximity. Albeit obvious, it works on a very micro level. For example, in a famous study of housing in the US, researchers asked who everyone had developed the most liking / attraction for. Unsurprisingly it was the people living in the same block, even though no apartment was really more than a few hundred meters away, that both men and women had expressed the most attraction to.  Other studies have shown that mere exposure – even without any interaction – has a proactive effect on liking. 

Step two: show interest and liking

Reciprocal liking is another key element. We all like to be liked. If someone thinks you like them because you have paid attention, maintained eye contact and positive posture, they are much more likely to like you back. Reciprocal liking is even important  if the object of your fancy knows you may share views and other important factors. In studies that have tested this effect, men have expressed great liking for women who they believe like them.

Step three: deliver social rewards

Exchange theory states that when we reward someone their natural inclination is to reward us back. These are not financial rewards necessarily but could be things like validating his attitudes – when relevant – or perhaps just boosting his confidence.  In his unconscious you are creating a sort of balance sheet and he will be obliged to give back.

So ladies, start hanging out in places you’re likely to find a vintage specimen, flirt away and be extra complimentary every time he mentions his liking for fedora hats.

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2 Responses

  1. Katie

    Or just accept that not everyone will like the same things as you & that’s ok?

  2. Hala Pickford

    I…don’t get it. LA has a mini vintage scene (mostly 40s and 50s) and all the guys seem to be a little ‘off’. Of course I haven’t met them all so I could be shooting myself in the mouth with that statement.

    I like vintage, I like to mix the vintage 20s look with the modern, and I love going to silent and classic movies. I figure if a man can not be bribed into at least doing the last one then he’s not worth my time. Especially considering the Silent Movie Theatre has both cupcakes AND booze.